Why i have chosen this..

I have so much to do when a day starts...Getting up at 5 am, and literally hitting the floor running, knowing that breakfast has to be done.. bags packed.. Issak (for now) loaded.. drive to gallatin.. drive to work.. work, pump, work, pump, work, pump, leave, get kids go home ( 2 hours later) dinner, baths, nurse, bedtime routine... QUIET!!!! and at this point its usually 10 or after... Can I get an Amen out there if your day is like this??

but having other people ask me why, that's confusing.. is it not obvious?? Why do I work my butt off like a crazy woman during the week?? For my kids of course... So Issak can go to that cool summer camp, So Maddy can get outside time, AND most importantly, so mom can get a break... Work... a break you say... YES that's what I said.. see although being at home is nice because you get that one on one time with your children, I guess for me its easier to work. Because when I get home, I eat up my time with them. I honestly understand the phrase "absence makes the heart grow fonder" I miss my kids when I am at work, but I love my job and what I do, so it makes it easier to say goodbye...

Our arrangement at home for now is CRAZY!!! Jonathon works until 12 gets home around 2, gets up at 9 with the kids (Morgan and Maddy), and drops them off at a friends at 3. I get home at 6.. so other than seeing him sleep.. we have no relationship right now.. we talk via text and email and a very occasional phone call.. I DO NOT LIKE THIS AT ALL!!!! but as f now there is really no way to change this...

Its stressful.. I am an emotional wreck a lot of time, I miss my husband, and I am extremely lonely..

BUT my kids are AWESOME!.. Gotta be the glass half full kind of person... appreciating the fact that I have food in my cup boards, great friends, and 3 of the most terrific kids ever. I HAVE to have something to look forward to in life.. otherwise, I would keel over..

"It's easy to get discouraged when things are going badly, but we shouldn't;t lose heart, because the grace of God is at work in our lives, even in the midst of pain and suffering. Remember that the next time your little hut seems to be burning to the ground, it just may be the smoke signal that summons the Grace of God"

Here's looking up KID!!
Busy Bee
J :)